Joel was changing Jake's diapers in the living room one day when Jake pulled a boy and sprayed pee for several feet. Kim's mom had left a Cosmopolitan magazine on the floor by our loveseat and Jake managed to completely drench covergirl Claudia Schiffer with a golden shower. We were laughing at his taste and obvious disrespect for supermodels when he peed again, this time drenching a statue of Bodhidharma, a Buddha-like monk. We figure his karma is well-balanced.
Our days are filled with breastfeeding (sometimes more frequently than every hour) and changing diapers (usually around 10 per day but getting less) and trying to figure out what his other needs might be. Kim fondly calls herself the Dairy Queen and saturates many shirts and receiving blankets each day with abundant breast milk.
We spend our time dancing with Jake. Joel reads him Shakespeare and Pablo Neruda, a Chilean poet. Joel realizes why you don't see many long-haired fathers...nothing like leaning over while changing a baby and dragging your hair through a poopy diaper or realizing just how strong a baby's grip really can be.
It is not easy, and sometimes seems harder than we imagined for many reasons we never imagined. Joel is working full hours at work with proposal deadlines and traveling to distant meetings in June and July. The isolating and tediously exhausting mantra of feeding/changing diapers/burping Jake and trying to figure out what is wrong when none of those things seem to placate him sometimes drains all of Kim's energy as she also deals with her own healing (mentally and physically). Kim still finds it challenging to stand for long amounts of time. When Joel is at home he can help with Jake and other life stuff (we do have other lives...right?), but there is never enough time and energy. But Jake changes every day and is incredibly beautiful and we find the energy and peace to love him more and more. We try so hard because he deserves our best.
We appreciate all the support we have received from everyone during this intense and exciting time. Come by and visit...and we always appreciate any food you might scrounge up.
Well, as child-rearing responsibilities increased, my reporting of Jake's life story proportionately decreased. But finally, two years later, I got around to catching up. It was a pretty intense two years, with a lot of joys and parental fears...but I get ahead of myself. Let's find out about the next chapter of Jake's life.
Joel Parker
(joel@boulder.swri.edu)
